Khmer Magazines 2018



Q: How many politicians does it take to change a lightbulb ? A: Four, one to change it and the other three to deny it.

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Where do you take a sick horse? To the Horspital!

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A Republican and a Democrat were walking down the street when they came to a homeless person. The Republican gave the homeless person his business card and told him to come to his business for a job. He then took twenty dollars out of his pocket and gave it to the homeless person. The Democrat was very impressed, and when they came to another homeless person, he decided to help. He walked over to the homeless person and gave him directions to the welfare office. He then reached into the Republican's pocket and gave the homeless person fifty dollars.

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Doctor Doctor I feel like a racehorse. Take one of these every 4 laps !

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Patient: Why did you charge me a group rate? Psychiatrist: You've got multiple personalities.

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An employee of USAir with the last name of Gay boarded a USAir flight with a free travel voucher. Soon after he sat down, someone else came and claimed he had the same seat assignment, so Mr. Gay moved down do an empty seat. Soon after that the airplane began to fill up. The rule with the USAir employee vouchers is that if a paying customer needs your seat, you have to surrender it. So when the flight became completely full and still more needed to get on, a flight attendant went to the original seat of Mr. Gay and said the man now sitting there, "Excuse me, are you Gay?'' The man, somewhat stunned, said, "Well, yes, as a matter of fact I am!'' The flight attendant said, "I'm sorry, but you'll have to get off the plane.'' At this point Mr. Gay, who had been watching all of this, jumped up and said, "Excuse me, you've made a mistake--I'm Gay!'' Finally, another m an jumped up and said, "Well, hell, I'm gay too! They can't throw us all off!''

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There is a new Barbie doll on the market - Hippie Barbie ...complete with simulated controlled substances and paraphernalia

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An out-of-towner drove his car into a ditch in a desolated area. Luckily, a local farmer came to help with his big strong horse named Buddy. He hitched Buddy up to the car and yelled, "Pull, Nellie, pull." Buddy didn't move. Then the farmer hollered, "Pull, Buster, pull." Buddy didn't respond. Once more the farmer commanded, "Pull, Jennie, pull." Nothing. Then the farmer nonchalantly said, "Pull, Buddy, pull." And the horse easily dragged the car out of the ditch. The motorist was most appreciative and very curious. He asked the farmer why he called his horse by the wrong name three times. The farmer said, "Oh, Buddy is blind, and if he thought he was the only one pulling, he wouldn't even try!"

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How do mountainers send messages? By ski-mail.

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Rumor has it that the new Miami baseball team will be called "Humidity" so that fans in Florida will be able to say, "It's not the Heat that's so bad, it's the Humidity."

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Why did the piglets get in trouble in their stained glass class? They stained it with mud.

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How does Ebenezer Scrooge make phone calls? Collect!

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Why don't apples smile when you go bobbing ? Because they're crab apples !

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I got a letter from my sister. She just had a baby. But she didn't say whether it's a boy or girl. So I don't know if I'm an uncle or an aunt.

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Q: How many MP's does it take to change a lightbulb ? A: Twenty-one. One to change it and twenty to form a fact-finding committee to learn more about how it's done.

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Don't eat the cookies so fast they'll keep. I know, but I want to eat as many as I can before I lose my appetite !

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A bumble bee was chasing a rabbit. Finally the bee turned around and flew away. Why? The rabbit had two b's already.

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Martin asked David, "In which state does the Ohio River run?" David answered with cool, "In the liquid state."

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Q: What is a conservative? A: A liberal who's been mugged.

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What reindeer can jump higher than a house? They all can! Houses can't jump!

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Teacher: What are the Great Plains? Pupil: 747, Concorde and F-16!

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What do you find in a zombie's veins? Dead blood corpuscles.

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What happened when the barman died? The police held an inn-quest

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This little snail bought a little car and took it to the body shop to have it painted. The service man asked him exactly what he wanted done, and the snail said he wanted little S's painted all around and all over his car. The service man asked him why, and the snail answered "When people see me in my car I want them to say, look at that S-Car-Go!"

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How does a witch make scrambled eggs? She holds the pan and gets two friends to make the stove shake with fright.

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